She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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