Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
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He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
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new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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