He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
Randomize
