More tranny stories later!
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
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