I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
I have post one night stand depression
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
