sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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