i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
