how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
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