i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
As shirtless as possible
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
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