I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Don't make out with my wife yet
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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