Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
