I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
He better not be in your backpack
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
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