what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I want to fling myself into the sun
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
