Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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