i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Randomize
