Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Woke up with a retainer in my boxers and about ten chicks passed out around me. now I feel like something out of Cinderella, trying to find whose teeth fit in the glass retainer.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize