Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
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