I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
