you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
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