People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
