he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Randomize