he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
