We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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