i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Blood and glitter go together right?
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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