it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
I stole a fireplace last night.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
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