i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
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