The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
