Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
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