Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize