Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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