Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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