She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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