I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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