Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize