Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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