we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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