i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize