What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
Randomize
