hell yes lets make some ravioli
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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