I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Randomize