I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
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Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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