Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize