Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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