Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
