He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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