I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
The Olympian is in my bed
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
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