whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
