why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
