Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
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I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
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It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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