Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Enjoy the penises
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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